We sometimes talk about ‘old man strength’, the kind of toughness and resilience that can hold you strong in situations where it would be easy to quit – because you have been here before and you can ‘tough it out’. But I sense there is also ‘old man knowledge’ that can shape and form your identity.

I did a short interview with my friend John Finkelde this week, for his YouTube channel, talking about some of what I wrote in Hi-Vis Faith and my other book, The Future is Bivocational. My ‘prep’ was a gym session where I read the questions and formed some gut level responses.

The final question was this one:

You’ve experienced massive loss in the last few years your son Sam, your brother, your parents. How has that grief reshaped the way you think about work and what really matters?

I pondered that for a bit, wondering what I could offer here, and then realised that the reason I was struggling to form an answer was because it hadn’t ‘reshaped the way I think about work and what really matters.’ In fact what it did was showed me that the stuff I am betting my life on is trustworthy. I didn’t feel like I needed any massive shift because we try to live in light of who Jesus is and what he calls us to. So when tragedy struck we were devastated but not disillusioned.

On Thursday night this week we watched Unsung Hero, a pretty simple story about an Aussie Christian family who lose everything in a bad deal and make their way to USA to try and start over. I’m not usually a fan of ‘Christian movies’ because they often just ooze cheese, but this one was a good story and very ‘easy watching’ when you are tired – unlike a Bourne identity spy thriller. On my way to a job the next day, I was listening to a podcast with Helen Smallbone, the ‘mum’ of the family (the ‘unsung hero’) where she was asked if her faith was rocked by the total financial wipeout. She paused for a moment then said ‘No – our faith wasn’t rocked – our faith and trust in God was what got us thru.‘ She sounded solid and strong – not trying to hard to convince anyone – just a knowledge that this is how it is.

I smiled as I heard that. Her words rang true. When you have as much experience of God’s faithfulness as we have had over our lives then your response to tragedy, disaster or pain isn’t immediate questioning or doubt. It’s taking hope and finding strength where you don’t have strength. I don’t mean that to sound easy, but in one sense it is. If our practice is to reflexively turn to God in every moment of life – in gratitude, in seeking direction or in suffering then this is what we will do.

So if you’re reading this and you’re 21 years old and thinking ‘good for you old man’, then I would want to say that the place we find ourselves today is the result of years and years of practice – decades of ‘focusing Godwards’ in whatever situation we find ourselves. We have had so much to give thanks for over the years – it has been a very good life so far. Yes, we have had tragedy as well and it has marked us, but it hasn’t shattered us.

So if you’re wondering what the key is to a rugged, resilient faith is then my suggestion is that the key is found in regularly turning to God in the many different moments in life. Sometimes that turning may be in gratitude and awe, sometimes in anger and pain – but in all of it acknowledging that a good and trustworthy father is who God is.