11 Blokes You Meet In the Line Up


Most days when you paddle out you get a mix of crew in the water, but there are a few that always seem to be there… at least in a place like Yanchep…

The Grom – paddles out in everything, stays out in everything, catches anything… always believes he ‘just got barrelled’ and comes in stoked even if its 1ft onshore and crowded.

The Angry Bloke – paddles around like a rabid dog on a short leash… Thinks he owns the place and snarls at anyone who looks like catching ‘his’ wave. He probably lives a million miles away, but this is who he is… wherever he is…

The Local – he’s like the angry bloke but not so angry. He treats you like you are are a stranger in his lounge room and calls you off waves like you are drinking his beer. More dangerous than the angry bloke though…

The old fat bloke who sits out the back on a 10ft mal and doesn’t catch anything – ever – he’s been surfing for a long time now so just to get in the water is an achievement in itself. He sits there for a while, paddles and wheezes while trying to catch a few waves then gets rolled and comes in. He’s back out again in 3 months time for more of the same…

The other bloke on the mal who catches everything – just when you think you’re onto that wave you hear a voice and sense the presence of someone who has already been riding it for the last 5 minutes because he caught it further out than everyone else. These blokes are not popular, but they seem to deal with being disliked pretty well…

The bloke who drops in on everyone – its bad manners whether you are a local, a superstar, or just a fool. You can only get away for this with so long before someone will have had enough.

The guy who has just been to Indo – and announces his adventures to the line up as if he had just won the ASP tour. He might have only been once but he can make it sound like he lives there.

The chick – no longer wannabes or eye candy for blokes between sets, a heap of girls can really make their mark in the water. There still aren’t a heap of girls out there, but times are changing.

The Euro bloke – who things ‘oy’ and ‘hey’ mean ‘nice wave – why don’t we share’… They don’t. These guys generally understand expletives pretty well though.

The beginner – amusing – sometimes hilarious – but usually dangerous. You can spot them on the soft-mals bobbing around on the inside or sitting wide. So long as they stay there they are harmless, but you don’t want to get caught inside with one.

The SUP – also a rare breed, but a step up from the bloke on the mal who catches everything. Now he only catches everything if these guys don’t get it first.

I’m sure there are more, but that’s just my reflection after a few weeks of some great waves here in Yanchep. (And yes – that’s a shot of ‘locals’ beach from last week on Thursday just before sunset when it was icy cold.)




1 thought on “11 Blokes You Meet In the Line Up

  1. haha excellent, and having surfed since 1969 i’ve not only seen every one of em, I’ve likely been every one of em except Mr SUP, a chick and the fat guy on the 10ft Mal. Currently I try not to be “the other guy on a mal”. Nothing beats getting the best set wave, riding it through then paddling back out to take up LAST place in the pecking order. Stoked!

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