It seems that spiritual disciplines change and morph at different life stages.
Just as I was really getting into a groove with one pattern of connecting with God we went and had another child, finished at LBC, had long service leave and then planted a church. I was finding that if I was reasonably disciplined I could comfortably set aside the first hour of the morning for a meditation/examen type practice.
It really worked for me and I miss it. That daily practice impacted on who I am signficantly. The fact is it just isn’t going to be possible again real soon.
So… that’s it for me and spiritual disciplines! Until my kids are adults I’ll just ‘pass’ on connecting with God…
Or…
If neccessity is the mother of invention then maybe we can invent different spiritual practices. This week at the start of the week I felt like God was saying ‘when you get up each morning to the kids (usually its me and not Danelle) rather than seeing the feeding and babysitting as a chore, see it as an act of worship. Do it with the kind of heart you would if you were serving me.’
The previous week I had done it every day and felt peeved by it. I realised that I had been hoping to find at least 30 minutes space for prayer and reflection each morning – but it just didn’t happen. I rarely get that space now and I have been annoyed by it.
Fact is not much is going to change!
So this week I approached it a little differently. I can’t say I am a better person for it – but then that’s often the nature of disciplines. What happens is rarely visible on the surface.
It was funny on Thursday morning I woke at 5.45 and thought I would sneak into my study for some quiet time before the kids woke (usually anywhere between 6.00 and 7.00). When I had been there 10 minutes a little face appeared at the door…
‘Can I see a bit of Alfy
dad?’ (her favourite kids computer site)
It just wasn’t meant to be! I guess what I’ve been contemplating and trying to implement is the idea of developing our spirituality in every day practices. We have all spoken about it, but to do it takes a mental shift.
I’d much rather have my hour each morning, but for now… I will learn.